What is self-esteem, and why is it important for happiness
How often do you premeditate such a simple, but at the same time a multi-faceted question, such as: "Who am I? Who I am? " When was the last time you devote time to self-analysis and a similar cognitive defragmentation? This should deal with everyone, because of what we think and feel within yourself, all life depends. We want to talk about such a concept as "self-esteem", and that it means for modern man happiness is formed attitude to yourself and what factors influence who you are and how you see yourself.
What is self-esteem?
Self-esteem can be defined as a subjective representation of who you are, in combination with how you yourself see yourself and feel. Self-esteem, in fact, is not concerned with how others see you, as the environment may think you are better or worse than you are. This is what you yourself think you are.
How to develop self-esteem?
No one is born with self-esteem, as well as no one is born with the knowledge of a particular language or basic skills such as walking ability. It's one of those things that we learn and gain in the course of life. Over time, self-esteem is formed, but not by itself, but under the influence of specific both external and internal factors.
1. Interaction with other people
Communication with other people has a big impact on what you can feel about yourself. As a child, the parents were told that you're beautiful, smart and wonderful, at school someone teased you, relationship made you notice her sexuality, while at work you are confronted with how professional you are, and so on. All of these mini-communication stack up the overall picture of how your self-esteem can develop. The more you believe what you say about you same, the sooner these ideas take root and become part of who you are.
2. Comparison with other
Compare yourself with other people is very destructive, which is why modern psychologists are more inclined to the notion of "self-attitude" rather than "self-esteem", as the latter calls us to compare ourselves with others to evaluate and give yourself a specific "label" in its very root, but not abstract, but on the background of already existing, belonging to others.
We are used to compare myself with all: beautiful, intelligent, famous and rich. Any person who seems attractive, is the object of comparison. Also, all those who are losing our good qualities, too, reinforcing self-esteem.
3. Popular culture and media
That which delivers the promise of modern popular culture, and makes us turn to his self-esteem. It is hence the manipulation of consciousness. You just say what you need to be to be considered a successful, self-sufficient, beautiful and sexy. This also applies to what we produce and consume, what we believe and what to deny. Media culture is literally builds those individuals who want to see.
Of what is self-esteem?
People - being integrated, through the intellect, a set of feelings and characteristics of psychology. That is why self-esteem can be composed of a variety of factors that are both causes of what you think and feel about yourself, and what it actually is.
You can be an introvert or an extrovert, and this will affect the way you feel in your own skin and how to react to the world around you. The society is popular to be a social, open and sociable, that is an extrovert. That is why you may have difficulty with self-acceptance, and his character, given the way you see yourself, and how the world responds.
In school, students called smart botanists, which of course affects their self-esteem. But often such people become successful, rich, and, as a rule, their self-esteem is changing dramatically. Just how smart you think you can affect how do you feel and how she feel about yourself. Thinking that you are smarter than others, you will feel the superiority and even arrogance. Otherwise, - uncertainty.
3. Physical data
Who do not care what he looks like? Despite the fact that Andrey Malakhov bodipozitivizm more popular, everyone still pays attention to the look of his body and face, and therefore, self-esteem or suffering, or rises up to heaven. It's in our nature - look at yourself and others, to compare, and either accept themselves, calling it a trend, or work to become better. Of course, there is a third option - to ignore the shortcomings in principle.
4. The success of
This social factor, as a success, a very strong effect on how you can feel. Thou shalt surely be thinking, it is not enough smart, good and valuable as a person, if you can not succeed in their chosen field you. But the concept of success at all different, and therefore self-esteem is formed in different ways, depending on whether you choose a career, family life, or something else.
Also success - a state of happiness, which, again, depends on how you see yourself and your own life. If you're happy and happy about everything that happens to you, then it can call itself a success, no matter how much money you have, the effect of, and how big the house in which you live.
Health - it's part of the exterior, especially if your problem - it is not cold, and visible defects. Many people base their self-worth solely on the state of health and can not be happy if they know about their problems. This approach is not entirely rational, because the person may not even know what he really is wonderful, just because he has a disability, cancer or other less dramatic problems. Psychologists are advised not to identify themselves with their illness, problems and material needs as well as self-esteem and human dignity - is a matter of your relationship to yourself and not to the world.
Relationships or lack of them - yet another social tool that can both create and destroy you. If you realize that your human value does not depend on the number of partners is waiting for you at the door with flowers, you're smart and self-sufficient. These are the qualities that should be developed in itself, regardless of the circumstances, especially for women who have to fight even with other social misfortunes. Relationships affect self-esteem, but in your power to change it, if you can achieve independence and confidence in the fact that the lack of a boyfriend does not define who you are. In addition, in today's world you can find a large number of positive aspects of the "loneliness".
Why self-esteem - an important component of happiness?
As you already understood, how does it feel, and how you treat yourself to, determines the level of your happiness. If you can not love yourself and to accept, but you do not see a way to change something, it will always rest on the low self-esteem. Even if all goes well, it will make itself felt in the form of problems with relationships, insecurity at work and the inability to get what you want. To finally find harmony with yourself, you must learn to forgive yourself, to understand themselves and to develop their ability to analyze where you're really working on self-improvement, and which pushes society and the subconscious desire to you to compare yourself to others. A wise man once said:
If you can not make a difference, to change attitudes towards it.
Similarly, you can work with self-esteem. If you do not like what you feel, to change its approach to the Self.