10 ways to survive a meeting with relatives

Well, when we go for a walk at your wedding? So begins every conversation with me one of my parents, Uncle Sergei. He does it about that time, I turned 14. So 25 years all witty answers have been completed, and I just phlegmatic shrug. Mom manages to cram in any compliments very thick hint of grandchildren. Older brother all the time wondering why I only sister, I never gave my four brothers an occasion to beat any suitor. Aunt sure to ask to make a toast, because "You're a journalist." In her opinion, the people of this profession perfectly able to push the speech in the family circle.

Perhaps the hardest part of family gatherings - to be inconspicuous. You just want to peacefully poulybatsya all from the far corner, make sure everything is alive and well, and leave. But relentless pull you close to the center and begin to dissect the tactless questions and absurd moralizing.

When you meet with the relatives - something an average between torture by the Spanish boots and the Battle of Borodino, hold 10 tips on how to minimize the loss of nerve cells and not to offend anyone.

1. Stay calm

The first and most important rule - do not give in to emotions. Mother know you better than anyone, and will hit the patient. Not on purpose, of course, but solely out of love for you. Treat everything happening philosophically and do not take it to heart.

2. Use neutral phrases

To politely escape from unwanted conversations, use a neutral phrase such as: "I do not want to talk about it" or "It's not a good time for this conversation." From the first time annoying relative who likely would not understand, so repeat this phrase as often as possible, if the mantra.

It is best to pretend to be deaf or mentally retarded. It is impossible to carry on a conversation with someone who does not support it, so that soon you will be left alone.

3. Cooling threads

When it went in the wrong direction, try to translate it to abstract theme. This will help cool companion. The phrase "Oh my God! You changed the curtains? What a beautiful color! "Or" Amazing salad, what kind of fish is it? "Saved many lives at the family dinner.

4. Do not break their boundaries

Or violated. It all depends on what effect you want to achieve. The most common advice when dealing with relatives - is clearly permissible to build the border and show what topics you're not ready to discuss with them. However, this is not enough: you also should not allow yourself to go into someone's life with their advice.

For the most insensitive family this rule can be used the other way around. Start asking aunt who so ruthlessly ispohabit its square, or advise a good nutritionist. In general, become very annoying relative.

5. Engage in a common cause

Talking with relatives - a constant voltage, so try to do something together. See photo. Childhood memories - often the most warm and painless topic, so focus on what you have in common. We, for example, I love to remember the story of how my brother broke the toilet seat with a hammer. This allows a smooth transition to a discussion of its other stocks and divert the conversation away from my personal life.

6. Do not argue over trifles

Mom or grandfather, of course, can be wrong and be frank nonsense. Try not to prove anything. Notes nearly always perceived more acutely, because you've heard them a thousand times. The temptation to convince the man to put in place is great, but the occupation is completely meaningless.

7. Do not be arrogant

Let your indulgence for the weaknesses and imperfections of relatives remains only in the mind. Do not confuse the alignment of borders on arrogance. You can clearly identify the permissible degree of interference in your life, but be polite and attentive to the words of the interlocutor.

8. Stay with your partner

If a meeting with relatives to be with a guy you together, pre-negotiate some of the nuances. Most importantly - never to sort things out in their presence. Better not even to disagree with each other, because all immediately rush to dig into this, maintain some of you, and fueled the conflict. You reconcile that night, and they will put another mark on the map of your pain points.

9. Do not try to change them

To survive a meeting with relatives, you will need a truly Buddhist humility. Do not try to influence them, and even more change. You're not satisfied with the moralizing conversations rain, which, as always, did not start on time and spoil your new shoes.

10. Regularly pay attention to native

In most cases, the native violate your peace of mind, because they do not get enough attention. Talk on the phone regularly, not only on holidays, to learn how things have granny dropped into the guests briefly on occasion. Maintain a sense that you always are present in their lives and are interested in their affairs.

The ideal relationship with someone else - a relationship at a distance. So, if you want to continue to love their relatives, try to stay away from them. Then the rare meeting will bring only joy with a slight taste of nostalgia.