10 mistakes that you admit in the beginning of communication
When did you last talk to strangers? No, I'm not about flirting in social networks or the question "Who is the last" in the queue, but about the full communion with the person whom you see for the first time. Conversations with new people should practice more often to develop important communication skills. Maybe at the moment it does not seem so urgent, but when it comes to the interview, first date or location of the new company, many of us feel ridiculous chumps. Here are some common mistakes in communicating with strangers, which should be avoided.
1. Forget introduce
The Russian culture is not very common habit seems to be referring to someone that creates a lot of inconvenience. People can spend a wonderful evening, and did not know the name of his companion. First, you just forget to tell you who you are, and discussed a couple of those, you have embarrassed to ask, "Who are you?". Even if you do not plan to become friends or to continue communication, referring to someone, call his name at the beginning of the conversation. Let people know with whom to deal.
2 is limited eye contact
When you are nervous, it is difficult not to look away. But to show the person that you're talking to him, not with a cactus on the windowsill necessary. Eye contact establishes an emotional connection between the interlocutors. Whatever you may say, it will have a much greater effect if you use the view.
3. Do not smile
The smile - one of the few universal social behaviors. Start a conversation with a polite smile is appropriate, even if there are six in the morning and you're in Russia. In each country, it decided to demonstrate goodwill on their own, but the gesture is clear at any age and in any language.
Public relaxed people make a good impression and credible. Raised shoulders - a sign that you are ready to attack. It does not matter, either literally or figuratively. So watch your posture.
5. the chin
Even if you feel insecure when dealing with unfamiliar person, you still want to show that you trust him. In the first communication nonverbal contact is especially important, because you know even a little of each other and there is an impression of what you see. So - above your head!
6. Do not ask questions
People find it difficult to suddenly start talking about himself. Therefore, dialogue stumbles about awkward pauses or switched to minor details like beautiful curtains or the weather outside the window, it always looks strained. Ask a question - this is the easiest and most appropriate way to start a conversation. Ask how the day went, what he does at work - anything, as long as it will relax you both.
7. Ask closed questions
Oh yes! Anything other than closed questions that can only be answered "yes" or "no." They reduce the conversation to zero, and you will again need to invent an excuse to talk. Especially this rule effective when you need to make contact with the uncommunicative person. By the way, if a new acquaintance does not look very friendly, it does not always speak about unwillingness to communicate. Maybe he just did not read our rules, so sitting and suffering from the inability to talk to people.
8. You look in the telephone
You want to show that the person concerned? Get the phone. Get him out of the hands, put on the table, do not try to quietly get under the table and even pulled away from the phone, for God's sake! Today it is almost the most generous gesture, which requires a lot of effort, but just like any other person.
9. Do not attended to
If your questions were valid and the person broke eloquent monologue, try to show attention during the entire conversation. Each of us is important to receive visual cues to know that you are interesting. Ask clarifying questions, nods. In general, let me know you're still with someone.
10. violate personal space
Body language is important. And if you have mastered it to perfection, do not get too carried away with his success. Maybe you get used to people for a couple of minutes, and your interlocutor does not like excessive familiarity. How freely and kindly nor leaked your conversation, try to respect other people's personal space.